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If you’ve been seeing a therapist, whether they’re new to you or you’ve been working together for a while, licensed marriage and family therapist Kiaundra Jackson, LMFT, shared these two TikToks so you know exactly what you should expect from them and what you shouldn’t put up with.

This Is What Therapists Should Not Do

@kiaundrajackson_

Things your therapist should NOT do #therapy #blacktherapists #tik_tok #tiktoktherapist #therapistsoftiktok#mentalheath

♬ deja vu – Olivia Rodrigo

Your therapist should not talk about themselves more than you talk about yourself, and they shouldn’t ignore your emails or get back to you really late. Jackson said in the comments, “On behalf of all therapists, I apologize for all the bad experiences you had.” She added that if your therapist does any of these things, she’d encourage you to confront them with the issue, and if they don’t change, find a new therapist!

This Is What a Therapist Should Be

@kiaundrajackson_

What else would you like to add to the list? #tiktoktherapist #therapistsoftiktok #mentalheath #therapyforwomen #blacktherapists #therapysessions

♬ All The Way Up – Fat Joe & Remy Ma

You should expect your therapist to have good energy, be a good listener (duh!), and be empathetic and nonjudgemental. In the comment section, Jackson said, “I would like to add knowledgeable, timely, have good boundaries, and compassionate.” Plus a good sense of humor doesn’t hurt, either, to make you feel more comfortable and add a little laughter to your sessions.

If your therapist isn’t treating you with 100 percent respect, or you just feel like you’re not getting as much out of the sessions as you need, here are some helpful tips on how to break up with your therapist. Be sure to have a plan for after you stop seeing them, whether you want to find a new therapist right away or if you think you may want to take some time off.

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